the individualist

“Stuck Swimming in Shadows” is my Enneagram Four piece. My inspiration was drawn mainly from the idea that Fours feel their emotions deeply, and they feel like something is missing from within them. I knew for the Four that I wanted to address this idea, and I wanted to emphasize that even though they feel this way, they also have qualities and characteristics that are purely theirs that bring beauty and joy into the world. The elements of art that I wanted to be reflected through this piece were space and value. I wanted to use blue to nod to the tendency for Fours to be melancholy, and I used a range of values of blue to resemble the idea of working through and processing emotions. I knew for the Four that I had to make a collage to emphasize this “missing piece” mentality since by definition a collage is a holistic work created from many different pieces and parts. Every piece matters, and every piece has its place. This reflects the core desire of a Four which is to have personal significance.

Another side note is that each piece of paper used to make the collage was from images of outer space, the ocean, the sky, or pieces of scrapbook paper, and this was done intentionally. I used images of outer space as a nod to Four’s Five wing because they describe their minds as their own universe. I used the ocean because of its depth, and the vastness of the ocean represented the vastness of Fours emotions. The sky was a nod to the Four’s ability to admire the beauty around them, and the scrapbook paper ties in the Four’s tendency to dwell on the past and their feelings of nostalgia.

Another hidden detail is that when I started this piece I created it on top of an old sketch of an idea for my One piece. I thought it would be a fun nod to the fact that Fours go to Ones in growth even though no one would ever see the covered sketch.

When looking at the finished Four piece, there are three main ideas that I am communicating. The first is that normally to emphasize depth in this way, your value scale would go from light to dark, meaning that I would have started with light edges and worked to the middle getting darker, but I reversed the scale to show that Fours are already in the depths of their emotions and working to the lightest part is meant to communicate the idea that they are swimming towards the surface and the light when they choose to work through their emotions rather than sinking in them. The second idea I wanted to communicate is addressing the missing piece mentality that I mentioned earlier. This light section in the center is also meant to look like a hole or a missing part within the piece, but I want Fours to see that the things they feel are missing from themselves are not necessary for them to feel whole. They are unique, and they are complete just as they are. The third and final idea is for those who do not identify as Fours, and I want them to have a glimpse into the emotional depth that Fours possess.

I chose the name “Stuck Swimming in Shadows again from the Sleeping At Last song, “Four”, because I was emphasizing depth, and I want Fours to see that they may feel like they are stuck in the depths of themselves, but there is hope, their feelings are not always the truth, and they have to freedom to swim towards the light.